A Perfect Day

Today may very well have been, for me, a perfect day. I had a Great Harvest marionberry scone for breakfast with some ginger peach tea in my new Haviland teacup (see picture to the left) and read a little bit before showering and heading off to church. It was a good service and I sat next to my favorite blonde 11-year old. After church I went and practiced for the mixed quartet this evening and then left the church building to discover that it was warm and blustery and unbelievably beautiful. I had a list of things I planned to get done today, but the absolute perfectness of everything, from the weather to the day to how I was feeling (content and happy), sidetracked me and I wound up reading for an hour or so before going for a tramp. I had noticed that there was a goodly breeze shaping up from the way it was squealing around the corners and shaking my eyrie, so I opened my windows before leaving and was promptly overwhelmed by a rush of warm, fresh air, so I opened all the windows and upon opening the door created the most marvelous cross-breeze that actually cleared some of the dead air from the top of my stairwell. Not that you care, but it gets stuffy up there and… well, there's really nothing quite as invigorating as a screaming wind! I left the windows open and headed for the open fields. I live on one of the low ridges that come down from Roxy Ann and although there are several other houses around me and the eyesore that is upper East Medford steadily encroaches (urban sprawl, anyone?), there is still a lot of uninhabited land, especially since the land parcels that are developed tend to be rather small. So I rambled. This is what it looked like:

This is also why I haven't left my valley. Believe me, I have very seriously considered moving away, but there's something immensely comforting about living in the same place all your life. I feel sorry for people who have never been able to really get roots the way I have. My family has lived here for four generations and minus Campmeeting and Guadalajara, I have been here all of my life. I know the rhythms, the history, what it was before the developers got their hands on it, where the mountains are and what's behind them. I definitely know the weather patterns. (By the way, for all you locals, don't forget that we'll be having a storm Thanksgiving weekend, give or take.) Oh yeah, and it's gorgeous here. Anyway, so, yes, I re-connected with my beautiful valley. The wind was divine, the clouds were wonderful, the sun was warm, and there was enough distance between houses that no one noticed me. I discovered that the low buzzing I keep thinking is an airplane is actually the sub-station, but I also discovered that the wind sounds different when it blows through different types of grass, which I had never thought about before. And I found that to the south there are lots of meadows and open spaces, compared to the scrub oaks and brush to the north. I tramped back to the house and ate soup and bread (at about 3. I just wasn't really hungry before.), propped open the door so the playful zephyr could knock some more things off the shelves, read some more, and headed back to church for practice and service. And then after church I got to come home and drink Mexican hot chocolate and read some more! The sermon this morning was about thankfulness and today was one of those days when it seems like everything is just a reminder of how much I have to be thankful for, including all of you guys!! The entire day was like one long sip of the perfect tea after a good bite of the world's most delicious shortbread, and now I get to top it all off by crawling into a deliciously warm bed. I cannot think of a single thing that would have made it better. Marvelous in a different way, yes, but better, no.

P.S. I am attempting to figure out how to get the posts to have a little more horizontal space. I know it has something to do with the HTML but I haven't quite nailed it down yet. Probably because I was a HUMANITIES MAJOR and never bothered to learn COMPUTER LANGUAGES. *mutter mutter hiss*

Los Angeles

Ha HA, foolish mortals!! I am lurking in my fog-shrouded tower…. Well, it was fog-shrouded a while ago, but the clouds seem to have lifted. It was a little eerie, especially since I was reading The Moor, by Laurie King, which is wonderfully spooky – which is why I was reading it. Anyway, since I can tell how touched and thrilled you've all been with my last few posts I thought I would sling another out into the void that is cyberspace (Beautiful! I inserted more whine into that one sentence than I think I've allowed myself in this whole blog!). Our subject today refers to the most amazing piece of news I have gotten in at least a month. I was chatting on Messenger with one of the teachers I got to know in Guadalajara (GDL) who moved to New Zealand shortly after I left and who I have never seen on Messenger previously. While we were talking, my brother (okay, okay, HOST-brother) Fernando came on for the first time, too! In the course of our conversation, he informed me that he is living in Los Angeles and is planning on being there until he graduates from college (he's in the eighth grade)! So, not only is he over half the distance closer to me, he's in the US and I can call him without racking up massive fees! So, anyone reading this from LA ("ha, ha," she said in a whiney way. What is my problem tonight?! Seriously, I'm not actually feeling whiney, whiny, no red lines so I can't tell which is right, at all.), you may be getting a visit from me in the not so distant future. I really want to bring him up here for a visit as well. I guess Juan Carlos is still working for them but is down in GDL with el señor, but who knows, maybe I can get him to come to the States for a visit. This is one of the few reasons I can think of for me to go to Los Angeles. I have decided opinions about that city, that's for sure.

And now, to continue the picture saga, I give you the houseplants. I've decided to do this in installments so that no one's brain falls out from over-stimulation, so these first two are chronologically the first two I received.

This first one is an amaryllis my grandma gave me when I graduated from college. It was blooming then, big, blood-red flowers, and Flo managed to knock one of them off before I even got the thing home. But I've forgiven him for it, so all is well. It didn't bloom this last year and I need to go do some research and figure out why. For all that it didn't flower, it certainly added a touch of arachnatude to the house and I think it looks very cool on top of my bookshelf.

This second picture is of the amazing Angel Wing Fibrous Begonia, my Christmas present from same grandma. It was actually not that impressive when I first got it, although it did have cute little pink blossoms, but once I fertilized it…. Well, you can see what happened. What you can't see is that when it opens up new leaves they seriously look like mutant egg pods. The white sheen on the leaves is because they have a satiny texture in the first months after they open, and they have silver dots on them until they get old enough to fall off. Zach, I know you're bored to tears, but bear with me here, this is the end of tonight's botany lesson!

One year and two days

I wasn't really planning on posting about this. I was going to let the day pass, unrecognized and unheralded, but something about the sunset, which was the most incandescent shade of pink and sulked around the hills, and later the newish moon floating mistily out my window made me want to mention it. That and the tea and shortbread; one man's tea is another woman's drug. One year and two days ago, about this time of evening, in fact, Joel told me that he was breaking up with me and sent me crashing headlong into what was definitely the worst year of my life. I could never have imagined the pain and, let's face it, betrayal that I would feel, nor the absolute agony of everyday living for months. This past weekend had some very odd moments when I would suddenly realize things like "one year ago today, I had no clue what was about to happen to me" and "we would have been having our last conversation as a couple right now." I wasn't bowled over by torrents of tears, but I had some temporal displacement moments (see below post about Super Metroid. The parallels in life are … odd.) when I almost couldn't believe the whole last year had actually happened. It seemed impossible that something that awful could ever really be (and yes I do know that there are worse things in the world, trust me).

However, and it's a big 'however,' while this last year sucked in ways I never, ever, ever care to repeat, it had some amazingly excellent moments, too. This post isn't a plea for pity or a whinefest (especially not pity. Now I understand how heroines always feel when they are being pitied. I believe "aaeeYAAAGGGHHaaaagAaAAGH" about sums it up.). This post is about the fact that I am alive, and not just alive, but doing okay. I'm sure I learned plenty of harsh lessons about life and people and fairytales, but I also got some spectacular memories from living with Nan and Moo and from the friends and family who have remained constant in my life, even when I couldn't have been at all pleasant to be around (quote SOB I miss him so much WEEP Oh Joel, how could you WAIL I can't survive this end quote). This summer was incredible: chasing thunderstorms, picnicking on Mt. Ashland, sitting on the front patio of our house listening to the trees and smelling the jasmine, walking around the school field while the dusk gathered. I don't know if it was necessarily sweeter because of the winter that preceded it, but I know that in the springtime, when I first started to feel anything like myself again, every moment of happiness was precious because I had gone months without them. *laughs* If you had talked to me one year ago I would have told you that I was sure I'd be okay eventually, but I didn't really believe it. Now, one year and two days later, damaged but no longer bleeding (that's how you get scars, which are, as everyone knows, way cool), I can say that God has brought me through and the worst is past and my future is ahead.

The Road goes ever on and on

Down from the door where it began.

Now far ahead the Road has gone,

And I must follow, if I can,

Pursuing it with eager feet,

Until it joins some larger way

Where many paths and errands meet.

And whither then? I cannot say.

Super Metroid

I had a fabulous time this weekend! I made a nice, leisurely stroll up the I-5 corridor, with plenty of stops to make not-necessarily-vital purchases that still fall into the whoo-hoo-I'm-thrilled-with-this category, including a little coffee table from Ikea. Mmmmmm, Ikea….. Tricia and Justin's wedding was beautiful, with great music, lovely decorating, and a great reception. And the ceremony itself was just lovely. Unfortunately, this wedding served to illuminate a troubling fact: at the rate I'm going, by the time I actually get around to getting' hitched, all of the unique and original ideas I have fermenting in my mind will have been used! The unfairness of it all! I had a good time hanging out with Melodie and LaDonna and Breanne and everyone else, including the elusive Melina (only a small dig, I promise. And I haven't had a chance to check the RSS feed yet.)!

One of the stops I made, I actually made twice. Nicio put me up for two nights, coming and going, complete with ACK!! One of the leaves just fell off my fibrous begonia!!!!! Sorry, that wasn't actually part of my visit, but it just happened and I hope this doesn't mean my plant is ailing! I'm already about to lose one of the peace lilies. Anyway, back to the story. The second night I was there, Nicio and I succumbed to the siren's song of Samus Aran and she plugged in her Super Nintendo. Talk about momentary temporal displacement! It was so awesome but so strange at the same time. I've had a lingering love affair with the Metroid games ever since Uncle Jim gave us the original Metroid sans any gamebook or explanation of the game at all. We spent hours delving into the secrets of Zebes and discovering the hidden paths leading to that nexus of evil, Mother Brain. Of course, when Super Metroid came out in the twilight years of my high school life, I was again transfixed by the game. Sheer gaming genius combined with a killer soundtrack that to this day has the ability to make me turn on all the lights at night…. *sigh* So, we sat on the couch in the dark, Nicio playing and me watching, just the way it was when I was younger and Moo would play while I watched. I kept expecting Dad to make suggestions or comment on a trick we'd missed behind me, and I kept feeling the layers of my life compressing in a way they don't often do. Honestly, Mom could have walked out of the kitchen and I wouldn't have been surprised.

Since I know that some of you are interested in other things besides video games and weddings, I hereby post some of my fall pictures. Behold the lower pond in Lithia Park! You can see the trees reflected in the water, of which I am particularly proud. The caught reflection, not the water, which is demonstrably green, dirty and disgusting, thanks to the ducks.

This second picture is one of the trees along the road in the park and is an example of one of my favorite kinds of autumn-ness. I love it when leaves turn all different colors at the same time on one tree, but in blocks so you look through a later of red to yellow behind, and then green at the back. Happy Autumn, everyone!

Guadalajara

I had a dream not that long ago that I went back to Guadalajara. Actually, it has happened more than once. Sometimes they are good dreams when I'm seeing all of my friends and they're all happy to see me and other times Antonia is berating me for not staying in contact.

The other day while I was perusing Bebo (not stalking, Nicio. Honestly.) I ran across my pictures of Guadalajara. Not too difficult to do since they're on my own page, but I haven't looked at then in well over a year. In a flash I was there again, driving through the streets with Juan Carlos, sorting the books in the school's library, hugging my kids.

Sometimes when I'm sitting at work I get these weird flashes of places in Guadalajara. Or I'll remember eating fish tacos on the street corner with thirty other people under one of the biggest trees I've seen that wasn't a redwood. When I was in La Reyna Bakery the other day buying pastries, I remembered walking a mile or whatever it was to get empanadas and chocolate milk.

So is it coincidence that as I happened to be trolling Alaska Air's specials, I came across a special from Los Angeles to Guadalajara that would cost me about $350 round trip? And that there is a special from San Francisco to Los Angeles to GDL that would probably cost me about $100 more?

*pause*

Anyone thinking what I am thinking?

Tragically for me, I've spent most of my recent mad money on getting into my apartment and getting the old computer hooked up. AlthoughI do have a small amount of mad money coming in.... Ack! NO!! I really want to go, but I think that now is not necessarily the best time. I haven't been in touch with anyone for a while.... except for Omar, who told me today while we were chatting for the first time in, again, over a year, he told me that I'll always have a place there. You've never seen any of these people, have you?

Behold Juan Carlos and my youngest brother Emanuel.

I'm sorry I haven't had these up before, but when I first started, Blogger wasn't so newbie-friendly. Now that it is, perhaps I'll give you a better idea about the five months of my life that happened outside of American soil! But yeah, for now.... well, I'll just let the plotting begin. After all, what's holding me here?