Friday, April 01, 2005
Touch not...
In an attempt to create controversy and mayhem (not really, but it sounds nice, and I thought some of you might enjoy this particular story) a certain relative of mine (an uncle) has aided me in coming up with a brilliant response to all of those who feel the need to comment on my single status (according to a ridiculous article in Time (?) I'm a "quirky single" by my deciding that I don't need to be attached. Ummm, and exactly why does that make me quirky?? Perhaps because I've chosen to throw off (for now) the bonds of conformity that contemporary media and society have decided to dictate?). So, let's say I make a brooaaad, sweeping generalization like, oh, "men are evil." Now, from the New Testament I can take "touch not the unclean thing" (and what can be more unclean than evil??) and the one that sounds like "separate yourselves from workers of iniquity." QED. There is no reason for me to be picked on about this anymore. *grins* And yes I can hear some of getting revved up to come after me for this. And I do know that I'll probably be branded "that kooky feminist nutcase up in Medford," even though this was written in fun. Ahhhh well. The weather is stormy, I bought new clothes, I'm in the library with the wonderful smell and feel of books around me, and for today that's all I need. I hope everyone has a great weekend and I expect some responses to this. Who knows, I might even respond back!
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8 comments:
Being you and I are in pretty much the same position, I have to agree with your sentiment, but not your reasoning ("no man hath yet hateth his own flesh").
I would say the proper response would be to go ape on the would be idiot, but then you would just be branded hysterical for lack of getting laid, and would not do service to your current reputation of being a bit "off" (It's a good thing").
Maybe it should go something like this:
- "Why don't you have a husband yet?"
_ "We'll, I just haven't been so desparate to get married as to dive into the pool of matrimony without checking if the pool is clean. Plus, I rather bask in the sunshine of singleness."
They'll walk away nodding their heads, but they will never ask you again.
Later tater. Come and see me at the JC Library on Sat. It opens at noon, and I open at 9. Chai's on me. (For Mindy only)
oooh! Free chai!
There are some who would say that being single is like having one lung, you'll survive but it's not a very high quality of life.
I say..."You think that's air your breathing now?" (I quote actually)
So, how do they pick a Pope? Is there a sword in the stone, a voice in a bush, a talking hat who sorts out the perfect priest?
Aye, mi prima. I'm in love again, in a very non-girly sort of way. It's more of a spiritual, ethereal thing. Andrea Bocelli makes me cry. I'd never seen him perform before and it just killed me, in my living room, at eleven at night, with the volume just loud enough to tickle my ears, stupid sleeping family.
Rats! I'm sooo sorry I couldn't check in for the chai, Bry! I had to be in GP by 10 and I didn't get your post till Sunday. I do like the comeback, though. Actually, your's and TJN's. My mom was actually asking the other day if I was interested in anyone...I think she's getting desperate again.
TJN: I understand. Concert pianists do that to me, too, and some opera singers. What can I say, I too am weak. As for the pope thing, I think they lock a lot of guys in a room until they figure it out. *shrugs* I think the arm clad in shimmering samite would work better.
Y'know, as I was pottering around this morning (read "making myself late") I was thinking of the weighty issues of life (i.e. your entry) and came up with a revolutionary realization regarding the recent rant. Quite simply, at least in a couple cases I could name *grins* the questioned aren't married yet because *gasp* they don't want to be. Ok, that among other things, but for pity's sake, it's not like it's even anyone's buisness. OOh! Better! Refuse to discuss it. Makes people wonder, which is always interesting. Though people will think you're bitter/in denial/whatever, you will have lit a fire under their imaginations, which is certainly a worth a little personal sacrifice...
For anyone else, you can just tell them that you're still grieving over the loss of Raúl who was killed a few hours after your secret elopement (We all know you couldn't have gone to Mexico to teach! What a ridiculous story!), while trying to free a fellow...something... who was being repressed. Oh wait. I wasn't supposed to say anything about that, was I? OOPS! Please, say you'll still speak to me....
Madam Min,
I applaud your need to be single, and your ability to not define yourself by having a relationship, but I still maintain that I will be sitting in the front row (okay maybe a few rows back, 'cause your family will be there) lauging my head off. I digress, I think you are fabulously single, the queen of your domain, etc... and you should be proud. Do me a favor, don't change.
Hold it just a sec there, Chris. What's with this "We"?
So have you determined who is Mr. Right?
Well, I have a really good candidate....
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